3 days until my birthday. WHAT.

So. An update.

(I've been meaning to get on here and write for days. Really. But...it's hard thinking about everything, much less writing it out. So here's a brief snippet.)

• I managed to avoid IOP (outpatient) and inpatient. I'm exhausted, I feel enormous and disgusting, but I managed to eat a bit more and not purge quite so much so I could stay out.

• I have a new eating disorder therapist. I swear to god, this woman was handpicked for me. She's incredible. I'm seeing her 3x/week (and the nutritionist once), so I'm getting some sort of therapy Mon/Tues/Wed/Fri.

• Insurance. I hate you. My new therapist is out of network, and on my plan I have to meet a $2500 deductible before my insurance provider will start to help cover costs. I honestly can't even think about that or I'll panic. Health + mental sanity > staying out of debt, right?

• I did this weird thing called "A Week with Ed." And it was pictures/audio of bits of a week of what it's like to live with an eating disorder. I don't know how I feel about that. I made it mostly for myself, trying to make myself feel better about my body...but now it's just hard to watch. I thought about posting it here...but I'm on the fence. (Plus there's a picture where you can see my booty.)

• My birthday is in three days (Thursday). Wait. What? Really? I don't think I'm okay with this.

• I'm cat-sitting for a friend this week while she's gone on spring break. This is Oscar:

He is actually playing with my ball of red yarn. It is LITERALLY the cutest cat cliche ever.

Okay. The end. Bedtime.



Anonymous said...

Shelmo here, yes of MWOP fame.

Just so you know I think you are incredible for so many different reasons.

One of which is you are fighting this eating disorder.

Chin up, chica! You can do this! One day at a time!

Anonymous said...

A great therapist and a cute cat. Life is lookin' good!

Hang in there and happy birthday!

Cait said...

(Almost) happy birthday, girlfriend. You are an inspiration. Just think about all the love and support being sent your way and I know you'll get through this. Um and P.S. I have *almost* finished reading through your entire blog archive. Does this make me sound like an obsessed idiot? Probably, but I wanted you to know that I have liked getting to "know" you through your blog.