So. An update.
(I've been meaning to get on here and write for days. Really. But...it's hard thinking about everything, much less writing it out. So here's a brief snippet.)
• I managed to avoid IOP (outpatient) and inpatient. I'm exhausted, I feel enormous and disgusting, but I managed to eat a bit more and not purge quite so much so I could stay out.
• I have a new eating disorder therapist. I swear to god, this woman was handpicked for me. She's incredible. I'm seeing her 3x/week (and the nutritionist once), so I'm getting some sort of therapy Mon/Tues/Wed/Fri.
• Insurance. I hate you. My new therapist is out of network, and on my plan I have to meet a $2500 deductible before my insurance provider will start to help cover costs. I honestly can't even think about that or I'll panic. Health + mental sanity > staying out of debt, right?
• I did this weird thing called "A Week with Ed." And it was pictures/audio of bits of a week of what it's like to live with an eating disorder. I don't know how I feel about that. I made it mostly for myself, trying to make myself feel better about my body...but now it's just hard to watch. I thought about posting it here...but I'm on the fence. (Plus there's a picture where you can see my booty.)
• My birthday is in three days (Thursday). Wait. What? Really? I don't think I'm okay with this.
• I'm cat-sitting for a friend this week while she's gone on spring break. This is Oscar:
He is actually playing with my ball of red yarn. It is LITERALLY the cutest cat cliche ever.
Okay. The end. Bedtime.