Shred no mo'

So I've been hearing about this thing lately called "The Shred" from gadzillions of people and blogs and tweets.

If you haven't heard about it, it's a workout video lead by Jillian Michaels (of Biggest Loser fame) and IT IS HELL. Or so I've heard. It's a 30-day program that you do for 20 minutes a day.

20 minutes a day, that's *totally* doable, right? How intense can things get in 20 minutes?

Well, judging by the people and blogs and tweets who/that have told me about it, A LOT.

But apparently the results are amazing. So even though I've spent the last several months putting it off (y'know, cause of my knees, and not because of my supreme laziness or anything) I decided two nights ago to give the Shred a go.

Youtube was able to provide me with the first 20-minute segment, so off I went, armed with two bottles of contact solution because I didn't have weights (hey! I was creative! And those bottles are close to 5 lbs each, right? (SHHH)) and a whole lotta confidence.


I lasted six minutes.


Now, in my defense, I *probably* could have gone on a bit more, if only I weren't so depressed about the fact that I couldn't do 20 pushups. Cause seriously, that got me pretty down. Here I was thinking I had Nanny Muscles! I lift chunky babies! I flip kids upside down! I can do a double piggy-back (one kid on my back, one kid on my front)!


Six minutes.

Resigned, I went to bed. And woke up the next morning with ZOMG HURTY KNEES. They got better after some advil and brace wearing, but by last night, my right knee was hurting fairly badly again. I decided against advil and went to bed.

Well, around 1 a.m. my right knee woke me up. The fairly-bad hurt had changed to THROBBING OW OW OW, which was enough to annoy the honest-to-goodness out of me, but evidently not enough to make me get out of bed and get advil. So I propped my knee up with about 6 pillows to help reduce the swelling, and strapped both my knee braces on it, and tried to get back to sleep.

No go. I was up for a few hours with my right knee which apparently just wanted to party when I WANTED TO SLEEP. It's one thing if you're up partying yourself. It's an entirely different thing if one of your appendages wants to party and all the other appendages are silently screaming "pleeeeeeeeease JUSTGOTOBEDALREADY."

Finally I was able to drift back off to sleep, and when I woke up this morning it was feeling much better. Needless to say, I'm not going to be shredding anything anytime soon unless it's my dignity when I play kitty and cheetah with the kiddos tomorrow morning.

(If those paragraphs made no sense whatsoever, or seemed like I was on crack writing them, it's because I'm nonsensical due to LACK OF SLEEP.)

You can thank my right knee for it. And Jillian Michaels.


Peggy said...

I am a lurker and a shred drop out -- did about a week, had to go out of town, seem to have forgotten where I put that darn video.

One of my friends planned to start shredding when I did. While she is in her early 30s, she has the knee MRIs of a 65 year old. She shredded for less time than you did and her knees simply could not take it. So, you're not alone -- it's very hard on the knees. In fact, so much so that I think I better not try it again, don't you agree?

Kaitlyn said...

I feared the shred so much I dropped out before i pressed play.

Anonymous said...

i kinda wanna try it

your sis

The Nanny said...

Peggy, thanks for delurking! And no: DON'T TRY IT AGAIN. Nanny's orders :)

Sis: you are the one person in the world who might be able to make it through the 30 days. Srsly.

Anonymous said...

I am also delurking...and I you can have a pass from shredding. I actually was able and WILLING (crazy I know) and did the 30 days. It did do amazing things, but I wasn't kept awake at all hours of the night with any part of my body partying. That had to have sucked. So, no more shredding for you...or just do the arms and bulk those up. That way you'll be able to swing those cuties around and not break a sweat!

Bethany said...

I have the DVD...I've probably done about 10 days in the past 30 (I was out of town for two weeks though and uh, then I had to unpack and then I had to clean...)

pretty much I figure I'll get to day 30 ohhhh when I'm 100. Maybe. It's HARD!!!

Anonymous said...

I've seen 'The Shred' written everywhere. I would like to try it but shit..I can't do ONE push up!

Cait said...

I did the Shred! In like, 60 days, but I still did it. Results - meh, probably better if I hadn't eaten myself into oblivion, considering it was Thanksgiving AND Christmas. But yeah, knee pain = no more Shred.